dear you,

dear people who come into my office,

if i hear that universally obnoxious tone of voice ask "mind if i borrow your stapler?" one more time, i am going to throw the stapler at your head. also in this category is "i think i'm supposed to turn in a copy of the midterm here..?", "ummmm.... i have a midterm..", and "is there a place i can drop my midterm off in here?" because those questions are almost followed by a "for which professor?" from me, an answer from the student that's the same as the 60 students who proceeded him, and a point of the finger from me. "right there. in that box. two inches from your hand. thank you and good bye."

dear slap watch,
i think you're the best. and so is jdem#10 for buying you for me when i was having a supahhh stressful day. and flowers. and for other reasons, too, but that's the main one i'll address at the moment.

dear friday after 3 pm,
i need you to be here. i am running on far too little sleep, a giant headache, an enormous stomachache, and the anticipation of a loooong to-do list this weekend.

dear pajama day,
why do you stop existing after elementary school?? i liked pajama day. however, uggs are a passable second choice. putting my feet in those babies is like snuggling in bed all. day. long. even when it's a nice day and i probably should be in shoes.

dear hiring process,
you. suck.